Piano player extraordinaire?

I had this dream the other night which included, to my foggy recollection, a huge elevator that had stairs in it, a large glass office building and a fund raiser. Sounds boring, right? Well hold on to your seats. Sylvester Stallone and Vanessa Carlton were giving a benefit concert for some African Relief Fund. Stallone announced that it would be his farewell performance, both in the piano jazz genre and as an actor. As a bonus, the whole shebang would be televised. We were all very excited. It came out during the telecast that the duo had not sold a single ticket to the event, and were given the live broadcast as consolation by the executives of whatever channel. There were even shots during the show of a completely empty theater. It was great. So Stallone started out, polished to a burly sheen in a tux and a three day beard, pepper gray, blowing us all away as he unveiled himself to be the best pianist the world had ever seen. Bravado of Cliburn, stylistic sensitivity of Glen Gould, with the jazzy moves of Harry Connick. To boot, he had this awesome jazz voice, not unlike Tom Waits, but in a high tenor register, which he worked with his little crooked mouth. Vanessa Carlton couldn't match, unfortunately. Right during her opener, the infallible "Makin' My Way Downtown," the promo for the relief fund came in: "We feel that this fundraiser is so important that we're not even going to listen to the music." I feel it important to stress that the televised Stallone/Carlton Extravaganza was different from the fundraiser involving the elevator with the staircase, though I'm not sure how.
I woke up absolutely astounded, half ready to write the Italian Stallion a letter begging him to bring his true artistic calling out of the closet. I think the dream was inspired by my recent revelation that David Hasselhoff is busy composing and producing a musical based upon his own life, in which he himself will star.

What a crazy world.