This is something that Sheri wrote in Elementary School, which she found as a bookmark in a book (no way!) that had been sitting on our shelf. I'm going to include all the parts that she scribbled out, because they are the best.

Hello, my name is Keckley Bucksen, and to set the record straight, I am a rock. I am an important rock, though. I am the prince of Kellar Grassland. That's pretty far away from St. George, Utah, and it was really long and painful to get here. By painful I mean, how would you like to be kicked almost 2,000 miles. Yep, that's how I got here. It took almost 5 years. Every now and then someone would come by and kick me towards here. It hurt and it was often very boring. Then one day, I was picked up and had tests done. When they dropped me on the table, I sounded like, "Plununk." Then a huge bunch of fleshy stuff came and smelt me. I smell almost like rain.
I feel really hard, scratchy, and bumpy. Hey, I've got acne medication, I'm taking care of it.
I am black and lumpy. I have bits of other materials sticking out. (My hair never works.) Then I've also got red dirt all over my clothes. I'm kind of messy.